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Joke of the Day

"What is it called when a heavy gambler goes on vacation? Paradice..."

"My son asked me what language they speak in England. This would have been cute if he wasn't 20 ... And in college."

"Maybe this is the vodka speaking, but Hi! I'm made from potatoes!"

"Met a hot waitress at a Seafood Restaurant. She gave me crabs."

"Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations."

"[first date] ""What's wrong?"" I don't like the ambulance in this place [sniggering] ""You mean ambience"" [next table] NEE NAW NEE NAW WOOOOOO"

"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow? Give her a shovel!"

"The only spanish I know is from the song Feliz Navidad, so these last few days have been my time to shine."

"When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency? When the chips are down!"

"What are four ways of spreading information that begins with ""tel""? Telephone, telegram, television, and tell a woman."