201943

Joke of the Day

"Poop When you say the word ""poop"" you mouth makes the same motion as your butt hole when you poop. Same with diarrhea."

"Buy Domino's Fire everyone Hire dragons Fire roasted pizzas Delivery in six minutes or less IMAGINE DRAGONS"

"I've made my decision. I can finally say that I'd like to have some kids. Trust me, I know I can raise then right. Does anybody know where I can find some goats?"

"When people ask me how old I am, I always say 45. They all think I look AMAZING for my age."

"What happened when the cannibals ate a comedian? They had a feast of fun."

"What do ducks smoke Quack"

"""It helps knowing that everyone else will die with me if we crash."" ~my 11yo on why she's not afraid to fly unaccompanied"

"What is said at the conclusion of a lesbian marriage ceremony? You may fist the bride"

"Fat women Vs Gravity Fat girls really do defy the laws of physics. It appears the heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up."

"I'm offering a $1,000 reward to anyone who brings me $1,000 and two tacos."