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Joke of the Day

"Your mother is such a whore... Groupon is sending me discount rates."

"When is a pedofiles favorite part of a hockey game? Before first period"

"apparently pharmacies think theyre grocery shops now. selling food product instead of focusing on exceptional pill service. Get real, punk !"

"Did you hear that someone put a hole in the fence at the nudist beach? Don't worry, the police are looking into it."

"Dove is supposedly 1/4 moisturizing cream, but this one seems like it's at least 80% bones and feathers."

"Hendrix didn't need to twerk on stage. He performed the old fashioned way, relying only on his musical talents and near lethal doses of LSD."

"""Dad, what's the difference between love and lust?"" - Well, ya know your teddy bear? ""I love it"" - While you're at school, the dog lusts it."

"Twitter should offer Shkreli his account back for $10,000 and if he agrees say sorry and suddenly raise the price 5600%"

"Did you hear about that amazing joke that Jesus told as he was dying? I don't know the joke, but apparently he nailed the execution."

"So I went to the doctor, and he told me to stop masturbating. ""Why?"" I asked. ""Because I'm trying to talk to you, and it's very distracting."""