200867

Joke of the Day

"the human body is about 70% water but there is not one fish chillin inside of us smh dam humans wack as hell"

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he ate the Pizza before it was cool."

"Where does spaghetti go to dance? The meatball."

"I always keep two kinds of birth control available: condoms (cling wrap), and ""fancy"" condoms (condoms)."

"Dr ""Do you want the good news or the bad news?"" Patient ""Good"" Dr ""You have 6 months to live"" P ""What's the bad news!?"" Dr ""...in dog years"""

"I went to the doctor's office for an Alzheimer's test... I can't remember the results."

"I don't believe Prince Andrew paid for an underage sex slave. That bastard's never paid for anything in his life."

"I have three jokes. Trump, his opinions, and his political career."

"When I saw ""likes music"" on her dating profile, I almost fell out of my chair. Because I also like music. Holy shit she likes good food too!"

"Best Bang for your Buck! would make a great punchline for a joke about bambi and the intricate workings of an illegal woodland critter prostitution service"