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Joke of the Day

"""No Karen I don't want to see pics of your ugly kids & stupid cats"" or as I usually say: ""Awww how cute"""

"My problem is I take things too literally. Like when my wife said she'd give an arm and a leg to lose weight."

"How do depressed frogs die? They Kermit suicide."

"Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year!"

"I like jokes about Ethiopians They never get old."

"I like to diffuse situations with humornnnnnnnnnAnd a machete"

"Q: Why will a blonde laugh at a joke three times? A: Once when you tell it once when you tell her the punchline and once when she gets it."

"Not only was my brother not mad when I backed into his Porsche, he even invited me camping and said to bring a shovel. Whew!"

"What's in an Irish 7 course meal? A 6 pack and a potato."

"Help! My Wife left me for my best friend And I miss him..."