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Joke of the Day

"Peyton Manning is opening a bakery. As a special promotion, he's giving away turnovers."

"I had sex with a Chinese girl. It was great... But I was horny again an hour later."

"My roommate is painting and makes a mistake... Him: ""gah why can't I Ctrl-z!?"" My inner dad: ""because z is a rouge letter"""

"Door says push.. I pull.. If it says pull I push.. I'm ether a hardcore Rebel or I need glasses..."

"I also like my coffee like I like my women ...ground up and in the freezer"

"What did people call the Nutty Professor before he became a professor? Mr. Peanut"

"What is an Ewoks favorite hotel accommodation? An Endor Pool!"

"How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI? The cigarette."

"Taliban Airways We make sure your flight is a blast."

"If your wife says ""take out the trash"" do not reply with ""you cooked it you take it out."""