199746

Joke of the Day

"Teacher: welcome to health class Me: my friend said you can get a girl pregnant by kissing her? Teacher: sir please just mop the floor"

"Me: sandwich for lunch? 6yo: noooo!!! Me: how about salami, tomatoes, cheese & bread? 6: YES!! I win."

"How did Matthew McConaughey masturbate after breaking his left arm? All right all right all right."

"What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on a chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin? A dick in your mouth."

"how did the constipated... How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem... He just worked it out with a pencil."

"How do people see so much on internet these days? They put on the Google!"

"Why don't little girls stay out late? Because Jared likes to eat fresh"

"Yo mama's like a brick..... dirty, flat on both sides, and always getting laid by Mexicans."

"Poop in the sink Shit will solve itself."

"A bad joke hit a good joke... ...what a bad joke."