199622
Joke of the Day
"What do you call a french man who's been attacked by a bear? Claude"
Next Joke
"Sorry I faked a seizure at your party but my phone's battery dropped to 10%, you wouldn't stop talking and I had to go so I could charge it."
"I used to be passive aggressive but now I'm aggressively passive. Don't mess with me, idiot. I'll sit right here. I'll f*cking forgive you."
"When I was getting my prostate exam, I asked the Doc where I should put my pants ""Over there, besides mine."""
"Velcro What a rip-off!"
"I bet you are a Taurus... because you are a fat cow."
"I was hanging out with some lesbians... Yes, I do have a penis. But don't worry, I won't hold it against you."
"What's big and brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre"
"[ad for umbrellas] [cut to me trying to swat away raindrops, just getting totally wet] ""There must be a better way!"" Voiceover: UMBRELLAS"
"I don't need to watch the debates, I read a bumper sticker the other day that totally convinced me"