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Joke of the Day

"""on your left u see fred in camo, on your right is bertha, she has ridden many miles on that electric cart."" If walmart had tour guides."

"Quote of the day! ""When shits about to hit the fan... I turn the fan off"" -Pfaff"

"A man gets a $5 hooker a man gets a hooker for $5 and get crabs. the next day he goes back to her and tells her. she says "" what did you expect for $5, lobster?"""

"People hate when I make my elevator joke But it works on so many levels"

"Why did the man lose his job in a fruit packing firm? He kept throwing the bent bananas away."

"What's the difference between Hitler and Keemstar? Hitler knew when to kill himself. Edit: Holy shit 200+ likes."

"Why don't Buddhists have Instagram? They don't believe in the concept of a selfie."

"ME: [bumps man] MAN: [spills coffee] Say sorry ME: No MAN: Then I'll see you in court ME: [remembers I own a camouflage suit] You won't"

"Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar Schrodinger's cat walks out of a bar"

"I'm not racist Because racism is a crime. And crime is for black people."