198946

Joke of the Day

"My dad always told me to treat women like flowers. So I tore my girlfriend apart limb by limb to find out whether or not she loved me."

"Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? Because he needed his space."

"why does beyonce sing to the left, to the left? because black people have no rights XD"

"Have you heard the one about the ceiling? Nevermind, it's over your head"

"squirrel making love A squirrel was making love with a nut. another one passing by is shocked: are you fucking crazy? the first one: no stupid, I'm fucking nuts."

"""Behold, a 3 headed cat"" ""um, its just 3 cats taped together"" ""Behold, a 12 legg...*tape rips, one cat runs away*..errr 8 legged cat."""

"If Royce Da 5'9 gave up his career in rapping.. He'd become Royce Da 9-5. ^^^^Mixed ^^^^up ^^^^the ^^^^numbers ^^^^last ^^^^time."

"What is the worst part of eating vegetables? The wheelchairs."

"To the account who followed me while I slept and then unfollowed me before I woke. My apologies for taking a break. It won't happen again!"

"What did the bear say after eating the doctor? I feel M.D. inside."