19894

Joke of the Day

"I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point."

"Me: My flight was canceled so I won't be home until tomorrow. Her: but you said you were just going out for milk."

"Why does the chicken want to cross that road Because he wanted to reach the other side"

"So far 42 out of 43 presidents actually ran for office. FDR just kind of rolled himself in there."

"Since Ghandi walked barefoot, and ate a diet giving him bad breath, he was... A super Calloused Fragile Mystic Hexed by Halitosis!"

"A guy walks into a building with his boss. Ouch. You'd think that at least one of them should have seen it. EDIT: A twist on the classic ""a guy walks into a bar"" joke."

"You do realize that if you save yourself for marriage, you'll only have sex like three or four times ever?"

"Professor: A wise man doubts everything. Only a pin-head is positive. Student: Are you sure of that sir? Professor: Positive."

"Times New Roman walks into a saloon. The bartender says to him, ""I'm sorry, we don't serve your type here."" So he shot the serif."

"A Baby Seal Walks Into A Club"