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Joke of the Day

"We're hosting a charity event for the people who struggle to reach orgasm. If you can't come, do let me know."

"Why does wally wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted."

"If a geologist is in deep schist, it probably isn't very gneiss"

"What do you get when you cut an Avocado into 6.02 x 10^23 pieces? a guacaMOLE"

"What's a cops favorite TV show? Justified"

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Ground fine and stored in the freezer to maximize the freshness. Oh man this is awful. Don't kill me."

"A donut walks into a gas station... ...and asks for a pack of cigs. The clerk says, ""can I see your ID please?"" Then the donut says, ""Sprinkles"""

"Say what you want about skiing... ..but the sports going downhill, Fast!"

"What did the baby light bulb say to it's mommy? I wuv you watts and watts!"

"""I have a particular set of spills,"" Liam Neeson says, eyeing his soiled shirt. He looks for a napkin but the last one's already been Taken."