198594

Joke of the Day

"*looks through telescope* *telescope thinks you're looking at him and waves* *you wave at Jupiter behind* *telescope awkwardly lowers hand*"

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"You can pretend you're a ghost at pottery barn, there's no laws against that"
"What's the worst thing about being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven."
"f (x) walks into a bar... The barman says ""Sorry, we don't cater for functions"""
"I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with ""Guess"" on it ...so I said ""Implants?"""
"The problem with political jokes is that... They get elected."
"Parties: for those times you're just dying to clean up twice in twelve hours."
"""Do you think our lord and savior ever masturbated?"" ""Jesus fucking Christ..."""
"*gets called abnormal* *checks for normal abs*"
"Math Beer So I put my root beer in a square cup. Now it's just beer."