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Joke of the Day

"Apparently ""The WiFi signal is the strongest there"" isn't the right answer when the boss asks ""Why are you spending so much time in toilet?"""

"it might be a handjob for her... but it's a career for me."

"What's an epileptic man's least favorite element? Cesium."

"I wrote a song about tortillas. Actually, it's more of a rap."

"What do you call someone who stole home plate? A rapist."

"I was astonished to learn that the meat in Subway was slaughtered in a traditional Muslim way. I mean how the fuck do they fit a rucksack on a cow?"

"What do you call an elf wearing earmuffs? Anything you want. He can't hear you."

"Did you hear about the thin guy who went to Alaska for six months? He came back a husky fucker."

"Sports Hockey has the Blues. Football has the Browns. Baseball has the Reds. What does basketball have? l l l l l The Blacks."

"I always make sure to buy high quality toilet paper... If you get the cheap stuff, you'll pay for it in the end."