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Joke of the Day

"Two muffins are sitting in an oven... One turns to the other and says ""It's getting pretty hot in here isn't it? "" The other muffin says ""Holy shit! A talking muffin! """

"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."

"on fire The chief of the fire department walks into the room where the other firemen wait and says: ""Take it easy boys, the Tax Office is on fire."""

"Damn girl, are you today's date? Because you're 10/10 I know we've been doing anti-joke pick up lines but this only comes once a year."

"Yo mama so stupid she tried to put her m&ms; in alphabetical order."

"Knock knock Who's there? A door salesman."

"Feminist joke How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? -none, feminists don't change anything"

"What do you call two jalapenos getting it on? Fucking hot!"

"[quietly] ""Always a bridesmaid never the bride"" BRIDE: Hey, you're not one of my bridesmaids! ""Shhh...this day is about you, not me."""

"I'd date me. But mainly because I put out."