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Joke of the Day

"What did the doctor say to the infertile Princess Bride? Inconceivable!"

"Give a man fire... Keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, keep him warm for the rest of his life."

"I was gonna make a gay joke... Butt fuck it..."

"What do you call someone with no body and nose.... Nobody knows."

"My coworkers think I'm always busy but I'm really just trying to remember my password."

"Today, at the train station, my mood ring was stolen... but I'm not sure how I feel about it."

"Your baby might be adorable, but so is my cat and she cleans her own butt."

"If Pluto isn't a planet because it's too small... then do you really have a penis?"

"The sculpture of Amelia Earhart in the Burbank airport doesn't give me that warm fuzzy feeling before flying."

"Well, well, well. If it isn't that thing I told my wife I already did."