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Joke of the Day

"I met this gorgeous girl on the subway... and I said to her, ""do you know the different between lunch and a blowjob"" ""no"" Ok, lets go to lunch then."

"Nike and TOMS are embarking on a joint venture... ...for every pair of shoes you buy, they'll donate a pair to the child who made them."

"A blind man walks into a bar... ... Then in a table, then in a chair..."

"My plan if there is a draft: Put a coat on."

"Why do people think Henry the Sixth was a Norseman? Because he was a VI KING."

"My boyfriend said it would be nice if once in a while he woke up to breakfast in bed... I put his bed in the kitchen..."

"I would never expect to get a penny from a dollar machine. It just doesn't make cents."

"Why do Buddhists always buy 1 ply toilet paper? Because they like to get in touch with their inner self."

"What is the official fruit of gays in Texas? Canteloupe"

"I saw a poor cat down the street So I felt bad and gave it two dollars"