198066

Joke of the Day

"When I'm sad I go to the fabric softener aisle of a store & imagine I'm in the clean mountains surrounded by blue sparkles and wild flowers."

"You know what a vegetarian will never get? A Spam."

"Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and wonder, ""Do my children just spit directly at their face when brushing their teeth?"""

"What do you call a prehistoric humanoid who likes to take his time? A meander-thal!"

"What is green and slimy and smells like bacon? Kermit the frog's finger..."

"Why do all kids with down syndrome look like they came from the same father? And the shuttle to hell is boarding if anyone cares to join me...."

"Don't you hate it when people mirror your joke and get all the credit? p ll pu o no o ldod u no ,uop"

"How many Harambe memes done an average human make a day? Gorillif I know Front page here we come?"

"Just bought a new disposable razor. Or a spaceship."

"I dont care or think about the people in my past... there is some reason why they didn't make it to my future!"