19805

Joke of the Day

"How do you know when an accountant's on holidays? He doesn't wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30."

"I always go the extra mile... because I always miss the exit on the freeway."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road murdered the chicken's family."

"I wanted to get a tan... So I bought a calculator."

"What's the square root of 69? 8 something"

"If Trump becomes president, it won't be called the White House anymore He'll rename it the Exclusively White House"

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the restroom? Because the ""p"" is silent!"

"My autobiography will be a single piece of paper that says 'Ugh'"

"My girlfriend said to me in bed last night, 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine.'"

"I got mad at a rock today. I chopped it in half with my lightsaber. Now there are two rocks. Send help. Now."