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Joke of the Day
"Sometimes I just like to sit on the couch and do nothing for 3 years."
Next Joke
"What do you call a sleepwalking nun? A roamin' catholic."
"What does it mean to be an Agnostic with insomnia and dyslexia? You stay up all night wondering if there is a dog."
"Random drunk guy: if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and I together. Me: It's perfect the way it is with N and O together."
"Whats grosser then gross? Shoving 12 oysters up your grandmothers vagina and sucking out 13."
"Terrible news. The guy who created AMC cinema's has died. His funeral is next Friday at 2:30, 5:20 and 7:45."
"It's pretty stupid how cats will just play with the same toy over and over as if it might do something new. Hold on, gotta check my iPhone."
"There are two things I hate in this world... People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch."
"When your toddlers are teenagers don't forget to wake them at 5am because your sock came off"
"Don't commit suicide, that's how people get killed."