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Joke of the Day

"I wish that regular church goers would stay home at Easter so that those of us who only come once a year can get in the building."

"Came up with this lame one... What do you call a posh shop that sells kitchen appliances? Selfridges."

"Car joke Spell shop..... what do cars do at green lights?"

"What was Hitler's favorite drunk food? Dictator-tots."

"what idiot named it Mail Order Bride instead of Male Order Bride?"

"Why is the hipster sweating? Because he wore a scarf before it was cool."

"How do you know when a politician is lying? When you see their lips moving!"

"My parents are middle aged. ""Mine are to-"" [parents burst through bedroom door on horses] ""CHILD! DOST THOU DESIRE NOURISHMENT?"""

"Get an attack dog, name it Anxiety, laugh and laugh and laugh at Anxiety attacks."

"What is the worst joke you have ever Heard? I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."