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Joke of the Day

"I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me."

"What's the difference between Doctor Who and Facebook? When the Doctor changes the timeline, it's usually for a good reason."

"""Dammit"" or ""Damnit"" are both acceptable, unless you are over the age of sixty, in which case ""Dagnabit"" is required."

"Dear sneeze, if you're gonna happen, happen. Don't put a stupid look on my face and then just leave."

"What's the difference between pink and purple? Your grip."

"Me: What does that cloud look like to you? 3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be? 3-year-old: Rain."

"A turd walks into the doctors office... and says, ""I feel like shit."""

"What is the difference between a hyper-active gamer and someone with a predilection of violence towards sheep? One's a button masher, and the other is a mutton basher."

"What is Hodor's favorite cereal? Raisin' Bran."

"I wish I could commute by roller coaster."