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Joke of the Day
"Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread."
Next Joke
"Boss: why do you deserve this promotion? Me: goes into very in depth pointless rant B: what drugs are you on? Me: good ones *leaves*"
"My girl's father said ""YOU TOOK MY DAUGHTER'S VIRGINITY""! I replied, ""Sorry. Won't happen again!"""
"Things never heard before sex, ""Wait let me take off my crocs first"""
"Literally no one wants to be on the phone with you less than the lady who answers the phone at a Chinese restaurant."
"What's my rating from 1 to 10 for Harry Potter? Nine and three quarters."
"*slowly unwraps a candy bar as neighbor talks about her new diet"
"Today I asked the gamer what his new year's resolution is. He said ""1920 x 1200"""
"My grandma told me her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter."
"Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren't the best teacher in the school"