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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a new anal plug and a used one? The taste."

"How will Donald Trump decide which ones to deport? By separating the good Juans from the bad Juans!"

"Popped a tire on a pot hole today Badum tss"

"Two nuns met a exhibitionist. One had a stroke. The other one just watched it."

"Me: I don't feel well Mom: Did you eat the plastic fruit again, Gigi? Me: No Mom: ... Me: ... Mom: ... Me: *throws up plastic banana*"

"Why was the snow yellow? Elsa let it go."

"Did you hear about the shy masturbating turtle? he really came out of his shell"

"Teacher and John Teacher: John. Give me a sentence beginning with ""I"". Paul: I is the... Teacher: No, John . You must say ""I am"" not ""I is."" John: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

"My wife is a lot like a facebook post... Lots of people like her, she gets lots of comments, she has been shared by thousands of people, and she may be viral."

"Billion dollar idea: Meth with Flouride"