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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the shy masturbating turtle? he really came out of his shell"

"Why did he cross back? So he could charge the client for travel expenses."

"The FedEx guy said I look like a sexy pirate. I'm not sure if that's considered sexual harassment or flirting."

"Minorities have the race card, women have the gender card, homosexuals have the gay card, but what do discriminatory white men have? The Trump card. Edit: so that's what they mean by RIP Inbox..."

"Her: Do you kik? Me: Like rocks? Her: ......."

"Dear Abby, I saw a questionable mole on this girl I like. How do I tell her without letting her know I hid a camera in her shower?"

"When I send someone email instructions that end with ""Let me know if you have trouble,"" I'm really saying, ""Let me know if you're an idiot."""

"Have you heard the joke about the Butter? I better not tell you, You Might spread it!!!"

"What happened when porky pig fell asleep at his construction job? The foreman fired him, saying, 'We can't have bored boars boring boards.'"

"What did the sheep say when he saw his girlfriend? Baaaaaeeeee!"