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Joke of the Day

"I have a chest cold, or, as they used to call it in the 17th Century, four days to live."

"What's the temperature in Motown right now? Three degrees, four tops"

"How does the Terminator lose weight? By counting Kylereese."

"I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. But he says he can stop anytime."

"Sex to a man is like hunger. If he can't get into an expensive French restaurant, he will go to McDonalds."

"I use to have crabs... Until the bigger bugs ate them."

"Question Does having salt and pepper peubs make my dick look more distinguished?"

"Why did ygritte break up with Jon Snow? She didn't want six inches of snow all year long."

"Knock, knock. Honey, have you finished taking pictures of yourself for facebook? Daddy needs to take a sh!t.."

"What was the bridge player's political view? No-trump!"