197130

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Obama supporters and Romney supporters? Romney supporters sign their checks on the front. Obama supporters sign their checks on the back."

"My wife and her twin were standing next to each other in the kitchen Well, long story short, I grabbed the wrong butt and my brother in law was not amused"

"The three most read words in the world: I? ?L?o?v?e? ?Y?o?u? ...NO! It's: ""Made in China."""

"Turtle 911: Whats ur emergency? Turtle: MY GIRLFRIEND JUST DISAPPEARED! 911: Have u tried looking in her house? Turtle: oops never mind."

"I like homophobes Homophones, I mean homophones!"

"This venomous snake is pretty scary. What can we do to make it even scarier? Put a toy for babies on its tail. YES"

"I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me."

"What's invisible and fucks kids? The Zika virus."

"I'm much better at organizing my thoughts on Reddit than I am IRL After all, most of my comments here just have the one point."

"I love playing chess with bald men in the park, but it's hard to find 32 of them. -Emo Phillips"