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Joke of the Day

"I went to the library to get a medical book on abdominal pain. Somebody had ripped the appendix out."

"What kind of fish loves to fix instruments? A tuna."

"Winston and a Cat What is the difference between J. Winston and a cat? One ruins girls clothes and steals crab legs, the other one is also losing the Rose Bowl."

"What do u call a black abortion? crime control"

"NASA finally completes plan to colonise moon. M:O:O:N"

"Just once I'd like to see a celebrity show up to the red carpet in jeans and be like, ""Oh, was this today? I was just in the neighborhood."""

"I was at a femminist meeting last week... they asked me ""How do you see lesbian relationships?"" I said in HD. They didn't like it..."

"Went on blind date, woke up in bathtub with kidney gone. 6 out of 10, would date again."

"What makes cows and horses so valuable? They have a lot of moo/neigh."

"Weird Al and Vin Diesel should team up with a chip tune band Then they could be Al, Vin & The Chip Monks"