196518

Joke of the Day

"Does Hilary's scandal compare to Bill's? I'd say it's close, but no cigar."

"Why are so many guys mean to their girl friends ? Because of the [central limit theorem](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_limit_theorem)."

"I'm not a narcissist. Narcissists spend their time looking at themselves in the mirror. I don't need to do that to know I look fabulous."

"Why couldn't the post-it note make it to his son's birthday party? Because he was stuck at the office!"

"If there's two things I hate, it's racist people and niggers."

"I lost the birth video of my son so I'm at the labour ward hoping to recreate it. I'll just zoom in close so my wife won't be able to tell."

"The letter E is used frequently and infrequently."

"[at goverment office] hi yes um.. my social security number isnt workimg. i've never once felt secure in a social situation"

"I really hate to get religious on here, but have you seen the thigh gap on Jesus. DAYUM!"

"What has 75 balls and screws old ladies? Bingo!"