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Joke of the Day
"Who's in charge of all the liquid measurements? The liter."
Next Joke
 
"The longer you sleep the more sleep you need. The more you eat the bigger is your appetite."
"It's taken me ages... ...but I've finally finished reading Stephen Hawking's book. It's about time."
"Pepper spray does not taste like pepper."
"So many brave flute players were killed by cobras in picnic baskets before one of them tried an Indian song."
"Did you hear about the 100lb midget with the 50lb balls? He was half nuts."
"Why do trash pandas always get into a fight? They trash talk."
"How do you hold an umbrella for a feminist without offending said feminist? She doesn't need one. The glass ceiling keeps her dry."
"To the rooster goes the spoils.. indeed"
"So I talkedto a gender studies graduate the other day. I told her I wanted a #1 combo with no tomatos or onions."