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Joke of the Day

"Why do trash pandas always get into a fight? They trash talk."

"If you walk into Whole Foods with a McD's cheeseburger, you'll be dragged to the meat locker & gang banged with a free range chicken wing."

"Is there some organization that evaluates the quality of shea butter? Because if so, it could have Fifty Grades of Shea."

"[takes a sip at wine tasting] Ah yes, this is nice. You can really taste the wet dog and Code Red Mountain Dew."

"Your heart! *bursts out laughing* It's an inside joke."

"Ants can lift 20 times their bodyweight which is really helpful if you ever need help moving a single blade of grass."

"What's the difference between UFOs and an honest politician? It is possible that UFOs exist."

"Brother: How do you top a car ? Sister: Tep on the brake tupid."

"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in my freezer."

"ANOTHER BULL NAME Q: What do you call a masturbating bull? A: Beef Strokinoff."