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Joke of the Day

"As of now, I only know of three Jewish holidays: Hanukkah The Bar Mitzvah The Oscars"

"What are caterpillars afraid of? **Dog**erpillars!"

"Why do you need sauce with sausages? Well if you didn't have the sauce then sausages would just be ""a jizz"""

"If babies knew how shitty life gets they wouldn't be giggling so much. Ignorant little bastards."

"What do you call the Hamburglar's accomplice? hamburglar helpler"

"Solipsism Everything I know about solipsism without looking it up is all there is to know about solipsism."

"Eating spicy food is like... Having your whole body sit down for a game of poker. Your stomach always wins while your sinuses and intestines get cleaned out."

"yo momma so fat when her name was the answer to a crossword clue, it was 10 spaces down and 10000 spaces WIDE!"

"How many sides does a pentagon have? Jet fuel can't melt steel beams."

"If I had to remove any part in my body I'd remove my spine, it's holding me back."