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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the leper whose wife died in a tragic car accident? He fell to pieces."

"I'm abandoning Obamacare for Bidencare. Everyone gets a sixer of Natty Light, 2 copies of Hustler from 1978 and a VHS copy of Caddyshack."

"When i die, i want to die like my grandfather did, in his sleep not screaming like the other passengers in the car."

"I like to start every morning with a good fuck. Oh fuck...it's time to get up."

"What do Christians and Muslims have in common They think it's a sin to use condoms when raping 5 YEAROLDS"

"I was going to make a joke... But I fainted"

"I'm confused... square box, round pizza but triangle slices."

"Know why I pulled you over? ""No sir"" 1987, 7-11 on Main, you paid for Coke but filled your cup with Slurpee. We gotcha. We finally gotcha"

"ABORTION BILL A congressional aide asks a politician, ""What are we going to do about the new abortion bill?"" The politician replied, ""Shhhhh -- just pay it."""

"I've been working on my best ice cream creation ever but it got infected. It's my Magnum O'pus."