195623

Joke of the Day

"How many redditors does it take to make a good joke? Three. One to post it, the second to post a better punchline in the comments, and the third to complain that it's a repost."

"I stuffed my mom last night. I know you're thinking I have an Oedipus complex and that's gross but jokes on you I'm a taxidermist"

"I want to die quietly in my sleep like my grandad did. Not screaming in terror like his passengers."

"Q: What do you call a blind German? A: A Not See (Nazi)"

"Married people always ask when you're getting married like they get points for recruiting to their club of misery."

"Pedophiles may be bad people... ... but at least they drive slow through the school zones"

"MOST LETTERS Q: What two words contain the most letters? A: Post office."

"A shrinking man walks into a doctors office. The receptionist says, ""you'll have to be a little patient""."

"Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest? Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars."

"Talking to my old man on the phone Dad: Who was that coughing in the background? Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece? I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss"