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Joke of the Day

"*Bee lands on flower covered in another flower's pollen* FLOWER: What's that? BEE: I can explain F: I don't want to hear your lies, Ian"

"I like my Women, like I Like my Water. Free"

"Whats got wrinkles and hangs out your undies? Your granny"

"Today I saw Flash walking by, on the street. He must really be a shitty flash."

"Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all stupid people."

"I bought a chilli dog and a thumb drive at a gas station... Ya know, for shits and gigs."

"If you factor in ""supply and demand""... she DOES NOT want the D. There is so much D trying to go around, not even the alphabet wants the D."

"""Trump is a good businessman"" He has a failed steak biz, a failed vodka biz & failed casinos. HOW DO YOU SCREW UP STEAK, VODKA & GAMBLING"

"I'm so drunk right now I just walked into Canadian customs and shouted ""Why y'all checkin' me?! Ur the ones with a pot leaf on your flag!!"""

"What do you tell a lady with two black eyes? Nothing, You already told her twice."