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Joke of the Day

"How many Republicans does it take to screwin a light bub? Zero. They're so fucking dumb that none of them can screw a light bulb to begin with."

"What begins at the end and ends at the beginning? Back to school ads"

"Getting a cat is SO much easier. Go outside. Put cat food out. Pet whatever comes to eat it. Best 30 raccoons I've ever had. Also rabies."

"Chris Christie finally got a job in Trump's administration. He's going to be the border wall."

"""I need to do extensive reading on this complex subject before I give an educated opinion."" -- Web comment that has never been made"

"So the Disney alligator killed the 2 year old recently. I hope the alligator has a good time with the gorilla."

"Got so drunk last week that I married a thermostat Talk about turning the heat up on a relationship."

"""Why don't you trust me?"", she texted both the guys simultaneously."

"There are two fish in a tank... ...and one says to the other, ""how do we drive this thing?"""

"Ebola Plague The CDC has confirmed that the recent Ebola outbreak is now the second disease in history to be known as the ""black death""."