194520

Joke of the Day

"""Hey bro shotgun this beer"" No I don't drink ""You wanna be cool don't you?"" I don't drink ""C'mon NERD!"" Grandma PLEASE stop"

"Possum 911: What's your emergency Possum: MY CHILDREN ARE ALL DEAD! Possum 911: You sure they aren't just playing? Possum: Oh yeah"

"What do you call an economics lecturer? Prof. it"

"Where do seagulls live? Shit, wrong subreddit."

"You know what West Virginians say about dating, don't you? The closer the kin, the better the skin."

"How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb? None, it is a hardware problem."

"why did Hitler kill himself because he saw his gas bill"

"two year old comes up to me asking if I've seen a dummy, unaware that she's just set herself up for the most brutal slam of her little life."

"Want to know how to amuse a blonde for hours? Write please turn over on both sides of the paper!"

"I'm starting to think my Girlfriend doesn't like me anymore. Last time we talked on the phone.. she told me she had to go cause there was a telemarketer on the other line"