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Joke of the Day
"What's a one way streets favorite band? One Direction"
Next Joke
"Why can't you get drunk with a sniper? Because they are usually done after one or two shots."
"Did you hear of the 2 thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months."
"What do you say to a kid if they give you a picture? That's pretty shit mate. My 20 year old cousin who has no arms can draw better than you. You have no talent, deal with it."
"Worried that Adele's next album might be delayed if she discovers Pinterest."
"That awkward moment when you run into your old pizza guy and you're with your new much younger pizza guy."
"""I need a lady in a sheet who is not permitted out in the streets."" -Taliban man looking for love"
"What do ghosts dress up as for Halloween? As John Cena because you can't see them."
"*looks under bed* *checks closet* *shuts light, runs to bed* *pulls covers over head* *ice maker dumps ice* *dies from cardiac arrest*"
"Why did the donut go to the dentist? To get a filling!"