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Joke of the Day

"Forgetting what you went into the kitchen to get is one thing but, it's darn scary when you can't remember why you went into the bathroom!"

"I'm staying at a hotel w/ a 'hotel dog' that guests can walk & pet. Which is 1. adorable and 2. proof that the gov't can access my dreams."

"Why did the brain cell go to the other side of the brain? I don't know. It hadn't really crossed my mind."

"What happens when a necrophiliac goes to a funeral? He gets mourning wood."

"Two peanuts were walking down the street One of them was assaulted"

"Since we're doing jokes we made up as kids: What did one lightbulb to say to the other? Watts up?"

"What's bruked, broke, and fucked all over? The country!"

"Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy? Because he was too far out mannnn."

"How did Canada get its name? They had a bag of letters, and one person announced as he picked each letter out "" 'C', eh, 'N', eh, 'D', eh""."

"Roses are red, violets are blue.... does this rag smell like chloroform to you? ,"