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Joke of the Day

"How did Canada get its name? They had a bag of letters, and one person announced as he picked each letter out "" 'C', eh, 'N', eh, 'D', eh""."

"Did You Hear About The Orgy In The Forest? People came in groves."

"A woman is on trial For beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says,'First offender?' She says, 'No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!'''"

"A message to all you deceased American voters... Vote Early, and Vote Often."

"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion."

"What was tina turners pet name for Ike? Beats me"

"So I went to the doctor, and he told me to stop masturbating. ""Why?"" I asked. ""Because I'm trying to talk to you, and it's very distracting."""

"How do you catch a unique bird? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame bird? Tame way you caught the unique bird."

"The first step to admitting you have a problem is having a problem."

"If there is an opportunity for me to put my pants on backwards in the dark, I take it every time. Apparently."