193049

Joke of the Day

"I was watching FOX Sports, but decided to switch to the History Channel... You still get to see the US destroy Japan, but there are fewer commercials! Edit: grammar"

"Why did Bossy slug Roy Rogers? She heard he was a cowpuncher!"

"We burried my grandmother last week... So she's probably dead by now."

"The kids wanted the Zero Gravity Laser Racer, a toy car that follows a laser. I handed them a flashlight and pointed at the cat."

"A new study suggests that a future study will completely contradict this study."

"Taco Bell manager: I'm sorry, you didn't get the job. It's your drug test Me: so you mean... Manager: yes, you passed. Get high & re-apply"

"""The only way I'd go to a Justin Bieber concert, is if it was a Jay-Z concert"" - my 9 yr old daughter"

"What kind of cologne applies itself? Elon Musk"

"When someone picks up your call after 3 or 4 rings you should know they were seriously contemplating letting you go to voicemail"

"Two men walk into a bar... One of them gets a concussion and the other gets a bruise on his forehead."