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Joke of the Day
"Hair on the muff They are old enough"
Next Joke
"LPT...never trust a Genie who.... calls his penis his LAMP. I never got my wishes."
"If a meteor goes to a restaurant, Would he prefer his sandwich to be vegan, or even meteor?"
"Hey Chumbawamba, we kept you down."
"Why doesn't Kermit the Frog like elephants ? They always want to play leap frog with him"
"I just met the most interesting man at the laundromat And then I realized that he can't even afford A washer or a dryer"
"Whooooaaaa, I'm halfway therrreee WHOOOAAAA, LOSING ALL MY HAIRRRR Take this wig, we'll fake it I swearrrrr WHOAOHH, LOSING ALL MY HAIRRR"
"Your Google Self-Driving car should be taken away if you don't let your dog sit in the driver's seat while you hold a map riding shotgun."
"I can't help but feel partially responsible for the fact that you're reading this Tweet right now."
"Whats the difference between Iron Man and iron woman? One is a superhero the other is a simple instruction"