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Joke of the Day

"What's the best part about locking your keys in the car at an abortion clinic? Plenty of coat hangers."

"A teacher asks her class what noise a pig makes... Lil Tyrone raises his hand and says ""Freeze mothafucka!"" I guess there aren't any farms in Detroit."

"What is the name of the event in which Hillary supporters move out of the US? A start."

"They should remake The Ring; instead of a tape, the creepy little girl uploads her video to YouTube and wipes out pretty much everybody."

"So I broke up with my German girlfriend. She said I didn't pay enough attention and suggested I attend a concentration camp."

"I couldn't find the thingy that peels the potatoes and the carrots, so I asked the kids... Apparently she left me two days ago."

"Just fyi, if you're girlfriend asks you if she should lose some weight... ""I love you through thick and thin"" is not an appropriate response."

"Me*suspicious the neighbor is a cannibal*:""Do U find this is a tough neighborhood? Neighbor:""Na, u just use a slow cooker. Me:""What? n:""What"

"What does a drama student do while stuck in math class? She Cos(plays)"

"TIL why windows skipped a number going from Windows 8.1 to Windows 10 Because 7 8 9"