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Joke of the Day

"Have you read GANDOLF'S new book about GENDER identity? It's great! It's called ""YOU SHALL NOT PASS"""

"Once a man went to a resturant and ordered an egg. When it was brought he didn't liked it so he informed the waiter that the egg was bad. Came the reply: ""I don't lay egg sir I just lay table !"""

"I always eat Eggs Benedict on a foam plate Because there's no plate like foam for the hollandaise."

"It's leaked that Caitlyn Jenner is winning the ""woman of the year"" award. Oh so now they're implying that men are better at being women than women are."

"I was straining on the toilet this morning. ""Where's the fucking sieve?"" asked my wife."

"[Courtroom] Judge: One more word & I'll hold you in contempt! Me: Yes! *jumps on his lap & throws arms around him* This is nice."

"What do you call a Chinese man allergic to dogs? Starving."

"How do you catch a polar bear? You make a hole in the ice and line it with peas. When the bear goes in to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole."

"What's the difference between a Trump and an athlete? Athletes know when to stop running."

"""Age is just a number"" ...so is your credit score, your weight, the balance in your bank account"