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Joke of the Day

"5 y.o.: Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby? Me: I helped 5: How? Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions"

"What's the difference between a Youtuber and a hooker? Both are getting fucked, but the hooker's still getting paid."

"Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?"

"*ding-dong* - ""Hello, my name is Tony, I'm here to bang your daughter."" - ""TO WHAT?!"" - - ""TONY!"""

"Why women fail at saving money? Have you ever seen a money-box (piggy bank) with a hole at the bottom..."

"We used to have a dog with no back legs and steel balls We called him Sparky."

"You're like a dream. Not there when I wake up."

"My attorney's sole responsibility after I die will be to unfriend people that post anything about angels on my wall."

"How did the woman feel after her legs were amputated? Defeeted"

"Movie Trivia: Cloverfield was just Khloe Kardashian on a shopping trip in New York"