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Joke of the Day
"My sister was injured in a horrific singing accident. ""Oh no, is Carrey OK?"""
Next Joke
"hAD SO MYCH COFFEE WHO wantS TO HELP ME STOP KONY LETS GO LETS STEAL A CAR BRO CMON"
"If Pokemon had a national holiday, what would it be called? Ash Wednesday"
"My birth control is my 5yo running around in circles at 5am screaming ""I have so much energy! I have so much energy! I have so much energy!"""
"'Marley and Me' has a sequel! It's called 'Me'..."
"Great shoulder tattoo. I bet butterflies are really significant to you and have shaped you into the person you are today, right?"
"College students... Thief: ""Give me all your money !"" Me: ""I'm a college student..."" Thief: ""... Have some of mine."""
"Phantom cellphone vibrations are your dead ancestors calling you."
"How do you know if there is an elephant in bed with you? He has a big E on his pajamas."
"What is yellow and can't swim? A bus full of children."