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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't Ronda go to Prom? she got Holm schooled &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; [/r/funny told me to go here >.>]"

"I ate some Tesco burgers last night. I think it's given me the trots."

"Marriage is a three-ring circus: Engagement ring... Wedding ring... Suffering!!!"

"Me on New Year's Day: 2016 is so going to be my year! (Morgan Freeman narration): 2016 would not, in fact, be anyone's year."

"What does an African child's mom say when it doesn't finish its dinner? What mom?"

"What's better than honor? Inner"

"Gay guys are fucking assholes."

"I ap-p-p-p-lied for a j-job as a r-r-r-radio an-n-nouncer. Sh-sh-shame on them, rej-jecting me because I'm b-b-b-black."

"Ben Carson is the best sleep walker ever Sometimes he wakes up and finds out he's standing on Republican presidential debate stage."

"What has 341 teeth and holds back The Hulk? My zipper."