19030

Joke of the Day

"Knock knock.... (Who's there?) Ellen Pao's Resume."

"If a clown farts.. Does it smell funny?"

"You know what I find odd? Numbers that aren't divisible by 2."

"Masturbation in the Mafia is called 'Offing Jack.'"

"Just saw a French band perform Livin' On A Prayer. I think it was Bonjour-vi."

"In retrospect, when the cop pulled me over & asked ""where's the fire"", stroking a lighter & whispering ""haven't decided yet"" was a mistake."

"What does Mr. Kipling do in his spare time? Pumps cream into tarts."

"I hate it when homeless people shake their Change cups at me..... I get it, you have more money than me. No need to be a dick about it."

"Which program do Jedi use to open PDF-files? Adobe Wan Kenobi"

"July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? i think not."