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Joke of the Day

"I was walking down the street one day and saw a young black man carrying a bike... And thought to myself ""is that mine?"" Then I remembered no. Mine's at home doing the dishes."

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"What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? NA'CHO CHEESE"
"Imagine meeting the girl of your dreams and then finding out that she eats spaghetti with a knife."
"By a show of Hans, how many of you are German?"
"Spider-Man, hanging right in front of your face when you turn on the bathroom light."
"Finally loses virginity. 3 more years left in prison."
"How do you know your friend is gay? When his dick tastes like shit."
"Alchoholic invester Is liquidating his assets"
"What do you call it when a crow throws a party and no one shows up? An attempted murder."
"""Doctor I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake."" ""Next time take off the candles."""