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Joke of the Day

"The American Presidential Campaign is a lot like the new Mac. **There is no escape.**"

"Cop: can you describe the guy who stabbed you Me: yes, he was not very friendly"

"I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. Although the doctor says I am okay, I still feel like I dyed a little inside."

"If someone offered you drugs, always say yes because drugs are expensive Jk stay in school kids"

"With all the news about Bristol Palin's pregnancy, I can't help but think abortion may have been the right answer... Her grandmother probably regrets not having one."

"When can you dive in a swimming pool and not get your hair wet ? When your bald !"

"I rented a tuxedo then didn't need it. Do you know how hard it is to sublet a tuxedo?"

"A salmon is swimming up a river. It hits a wall. Dam."

"I had a dream I was a muffler I woke up exhausted"

"I have a wig, I have an orange, ugh Donald Trump"